I was so sheltered as a kid.. which was a good thing. I loved my childhood and I wouldn't change a thing. But I always thought it was the end of the world if someone didn't get married in the temple. Or if I had a neighbor who was inactive that they must be miserable and bad cause they don't come to church.. and heaven forbid I met someone who was not mormon..ahh! Sean the Catholic kid in my fourth grade class might as well have been an alien.. Looking back now having a better outlook on life, an understanding of why someone couldn't get sealed in the temple, or why someone could go inactive. Or how sometimes non-members a better people than members. It defiantly makes me look at life and all of the many options I have.
Every ones life is different, opportunities come at different times, people fall in love unexpected. But I look back at myself this time last year, in the most tainted relationship, being more than willing to marry the first person I thought I loved. Thinking all of those little things like oh him having a job? Or like oh him hooking up with other girls... like those things will all go away once I get married right? Yeah.. well thank goodness it didn't work out. What a blessing in disguise that one was. But I look at some of my friends.. rushing into relationships, putting up with the same old crap year after year. Because they just want someone and heaven forbid them have to be alone!
Matt and Caren Dated five years before they got married! and then waited 5 years to have their first kid... They have such a strong marriage. They think that it is important to get to know each other well enough, to know what pushes their buttons, to know how to work through arguments, how to handle stress.. All of those things before they bring a commitment in the picture, let alone a child!
I look at all of my friends parents, my parents. No ones marriage is perfect. But it is rare in my friend group if your parents are still together.. I have more friends who's parents are divorced than who are together. I have met one family out here who is divorced...one! It is not near as common out here as it is back home.. which is insane cause I thought it was always the opposite. A marriage based on the church that I know and love.. should not end 90% of the time.
Long story short.. is I want to make a vow to myself right now.. GIVE IT TIME. Don't rush through dating to get engaged.. just because that is all we know.. or because we want to have sex. Get to know that person. Have a long engagement. ENJOY it being just us. We will have our whole lives to have kids and grand kids. why do it at 21? Live a happy, worthy life. But be careful. Know the man you are going to marry. Know yourself before you get married. Figure out what you want and figure out the life you want before you merge it with another. Different things work for different people.. organized religion works for me, it makes me a better person, it helps me stay on track, it helps me live a happier life, and I love the gosple. But it is okay to respect other religions. To love everyone, to accept the life they are living, just how you would want them to accept the life you are living. Help make others lives better. Love everyone, love god, and love yourself. Most of all Be happy. Do whatever you need to do to become your best self. And live it. Make your own decisions, but make them good. Make them worth something. Most of all just enjoy life. Make it the best you can for your self, and for others... I think that if we do these things.. wherever the world takes us, we will all be just fine!
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